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How to Be Loved

A Memoir of Lifesaving Friendship

ebook
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0 of 1 copy available
A luminous memoir about how friendship saved one woman’s life, for anyone who has loved a friend who was sick, grieving, or lost—and for anyone who has struggled to seek or accept help
Eva Hagberg spent her lonely youth looking everywhere for connection: drugs, alcohol, therapists, boyfriends, girlfriends. Sometimes she found it, but always temporarily. Then, at age thirty, an undiscovered mass in her brain ruptured. So did her life. A brain surgery marked only the beginning of a long journey, and when her illness hit a critical stage, it forced her to finally admit the long-suppressed truth: she was vulnerable, she needed help, and she longed to grow. She needed true friendship for the first time.
       
How to Be Loved is the story of how an isolated person’s life was ripped apart only to be gently stitched back together through friendship, and the recovery—of many stripes—that came along the way. It explores the isolation so many of us feel despite living in an age of constant connectivity; how our ambitions sometimes pull us apart more than bring us together; and how a simple doughnut, delivered by a caring soul, can become the essence of what makes a life valuable. With gorgeous prose shot through with empathy, pain, fear, and the secret truths inside all of us, Eva writes about the friends who taught her to grow up and open her heart—and how the relentlessness of suffering can give rise to the greatest joy. 
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    • Kirkus

      December 15, 2018
      How sickness showed the author the full value of friendships and love.When Fisher first met Allison, a woman 30 years her senior, she never imagined how life-changing that moment would be. "It was not love at first sight," she writes. "Or second, or third, or even ninth. For the first year that we knew each other, all I could see was that she was different from me." Eventually, they experienced the gradual development of a deep, loving bond that kept them close friends until Allison's death from cancer. By that time, Fisher was experiencing her own health woes, including possible brain cancer and problems with mysterious mold and environmental issues. Allison's patience and loving nature were the main factors in helping the author weather her illnesses, as she learned to let go of control so that the love and trust her friends provided her really sank in and made a difference in her life. Fisher shares her reflections and insights into these loving relationships--both platonic and sexual--as well as her battles with addiction in a deeply personal yet accessible manner; readers will experience the subtle changes along with her as the narrative progresses. Reflecting on the way Allison helped her change her outlook, she writes, "I had never been touched or held with a kind of pure and untrammeled love before, a love that wasn't clouded by anxieties, or by sexual desire, or by the awkwardness of being in a young body that doesn't know how to touch, or that--most important--didn't request anything of me." It is the revelation that love can be unconditional and profound that makes this memoir stand out from many similar ones. Fisher is not just another survivor of a grave illness; she has been transformed by letting another person love her without constraint.A well-written, emotionally uplifting tale of friendships, extreme illnesses, and understanding what love truly means.

      COPYRIGHT(2018) Kirkus Reviews, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

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  • English

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